My connection to 9/11

The 10th Anniversary of 9/11. It's so hard to believe it's been that long. I remember it happening like it was yesterday. Damien & I were both up early - he for work (when he used to have to commute from Long Beach to Pasadena), and me for school. I had turned on the computer ... it was back when I had AOL, and it was there on the news page - an airplane had hit one of the World Trade Center towers. Damien was in the shower, and I ran to put the news on the TV. I yelled into the bathroom that something bad was happening. He came out of the shower, and we both watched in disbelief as it all unfurled in front of our eyes. A tragic day that would change everyone.

I have a connection to that horrible day. It's not because I knew someone who worked in the World Trade Center. It's not because I had a loved one aboard one of those 4 doomed flights. It's not even because I'm from New York, although my family lived there and my brother and sister were born there ... that was before my time. It's a connection that wouldn't come until eight years after the tragedy. 9/11 left thousands of wives and husbands without their spouses, and children with out a parent. In a matter of just minutes, they were gone. Unexpectedly and without warning. Little did I know at the time that I would be standing in their shoes. And though the circumstances were very different, the loss of Damien was tragic and unexpected none the less. My heart breaks for every single on of those families.

I watched some of the Memorial coverage on Sunday, and as I watched those families, and heard them speak, it gave me hope. By seeing that they survived, and could even move on while still keeping their loved ones close, gave me a glimmer of optimism. I am awed by their strength, and draw from it during my bad times. The greatest impact for me was seeing the children of 9/11 - healthy, happy, well-adjusted kids - they hold their deceased mothers or fathers in their hearts, but they seem "ok". It gives me confidence that I may raise my child the same way. Knowing that he can still feel close to his Dad that he hardly got the chance to know. I have this vision for Colin. I hope to have the ability to see it through. I have one idea for achieving this, and will keep you posted ...

There were a couple of readings that they gave at the 9/11 Memorial Service that I'd like to share:

Turn Again to Life

Mary Lee Hall

If I should die and leave you here a while,
be not like others sore undone,
who keep long vigil by the silent dust.
For my sake turn again to life and smile,
nerving thy heart and trembling hand
to do something to comfort other hearts than thine.
Complete these dear unfinished tasks of mine
and I perchance may therein comfort you.


From Ecclesiastes:

To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:


 a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted;

a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up;

a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance;

a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away;

a time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;

a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.


I hope to find happiness again, for Colin and I.  Damien wouldn't want it any other way.